So there we were, me and Big Pete
Parked top end of Castle Street
In our police van big and white
Blue lights were flashing, nice and bright
The road is closed, so said our sign
And it would be for quite some time
The River it had overflown
Submerged the roads this end of town
And wait we would ‘til on its own
The water levels would go down
And only then we’d leave our post
Or get relieved in four hours most
The Audi driver came to say
“BUT I’VE GOT TO GO THAT WAY”
“I PAY MY TAXES DON’T YOU KNOW”
“SO DOWN THAT WAY I WANT TO GO”
Big Pete just smiled and said to him
“SORRY SIR, YOUR CHANCE IS SLIM”
“WATER’S RISING ALL THE WAY”
“WILL BE LIKE THIS FOR ALL THE DAY”
“HAVE YOU GOT NOTHING MORE TO DO ?”
“CATCH MUGGERS, THIEVES AND RAPISTS TOO”
Were what he asked of Pete and I
As we both looked up to the sky
“KEEP YOU SAFE’S OUR JOB TODAY”
“AND STILL YOU CAN’T GO DOWN THAT WAY”
Is what Pete said back to our man
And leant back against our big police van
And off the guy sped, not a thanks
Back into town ‘long Castle Bank
Both me and Pete knew where he’d go
The lane the back of Old Moat Row
That lane you see, comes back to meet
The road half way ‘long Castle Street
Bring his car out, yes it would
Right in the middle of the flood
Cones we’d put to close that lane
Keep people safe and in the main
They did as we had asked that day
Our man moved cones from in his way
And into Castle Street he drove
Into the water his Audi dove
Now stuck he was in Castle Street
With water seeping ‘round his feet
Called 999 from mobile phone
“MY CAR IS STUCK I’M GONNA DROWN”
The firemen came to help his plight
And laughed when they came on the sight
They said to him as they got near
And tried to calm his new found fear
“HOW DID YOU GET ALONG THIS WAY ?”
“THE ROAD’S BEEN CLOSED FOR ALL THE DAY”
With ropes attached to his new car
Fire Engine pulled it from afar
As from the water Audi man came
At police he went to aim the blame
“SUE YOU I WILL” He said to Pete
as he was towed from Castle Street
“FILL YOU BOOTS” and “GO AHEAD”
did Pete reply and shook his head
If he took note of traffic cone
By now he’d be all safe at home
But now he’s stood with soaking feet
Up top end of Castle Street
Constable Chaos - UK Police Blog 
Well I guess if you have to sit all day stopping people from being stupid you need to do something to pass the time, and what better way to fill the day than produce a charming rhyme.
See what I did?
You did, I did, you took the time, to make reply, so it would rhyme :o)
And it appears by name of road, you have through poetry your cover blowed! By googling names of those wet streets, you might have given PSB some treats!
Ahh but you see, I’m clever me, the names there are, they’re changed by far, stops PSD, from finding me :o)
I’m trying to think of what to say
and give my comment in that way,
but I’m wondering who will for the first time
spoil this blog and reply without rhyme.
As for the man with the Audi car,
well perhaps he will learn that it’s wetter by far
to ignore the advice of the boys in blue
than to listen and obey so he can travel on through!
Poor Audi man soon after that,
thought “Wish I’d not been such a… fool”.
I have to say dear Mr fuzz,
Your rhyme’s created quite a buzz.
It’s seems your talents aren’t restricted,
to helping toerags get convicted.
Apparently residents law-abiding,
In your district aren’t residing.
Those who cry “I pay your wages!”,
Must drive you and Pete to rages.
This kind though, always will exist,
But don’t take the bait, please just desist.
For all over this pleasant land,
Are many folk who understand.
That your job is one of the worst,
Always putting public first.
Whether decent sorts or scum,
Sirens wailing, you will come.
For every one that does berate,
Many more appreciate.
The job you do, is far from easy,
And some of your tales leave me queasy.
But the force is a vocation,
And you all show such dedication.
So when the towel, you feel like throwing,
Rest assured in quiet knowing.
That most of us are on your side,
And by the law we do abide.
So when you’re fed up, through and through,
Just remember, I’m thankful for you.
(And when you’re tired of being a bobby,
You’ll have at least a pleasing hobby!)
That’s better than mine !!!! 🙂
😀
When I get a rare burst of inspiration, I can’t seem to stop. #IKnowITalkTooMuch
Don’t know what your rules are about including links, but thought this news article was quite apt!
http://news.uk.msn.com/blog/trending-blogpost.aspx?post=167175a9-6a16-408f-a4b4-7bf5527d3ef3&_nwpt=1
I love love love this! It should be compulsory.
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Well that should have Shakespeare spinning in his grave faster than a turbine with a broken governor. Quite good though!